Most of us have probably been in a situation where we along with someone else, have delivered essentially the same message. And that message is accepted more readily from the other party. Why?
In the world of ideas, messengers mean just as much as the message. Context is a funny thing. It’s complicated, emotional, and elusive. One person’s context is another person’s bias. Even when dealing with good, hard data, there is no one frame of reference.
Being a good messenger is rooted in trust. People take advice from other they trust. If they don’t trust you, at best they humor you. The best way to gauge if you have someone trust is to ask about their problems. If they give you a frank, straight answer, you have their trust if they don’t, you know have a ways to go.
In the meantime, you need a person “from out of town” to carry the message. Nothing wrong with that. In fact, it’s a smart play. It prioritizes the message over the messenger, which is one of the best ways to demonstrate how important the message really is.
The right to offer advice is always earned, never assumed.
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